Page 29 - Seniorstoday January 2022 Issue

many incidents of bereavements of close Life remains unfulfilled in so many small,
friends and families over the past two years,
who had to face the trauma of not being
able to give a decent send off to the departed
or get the comforting company of strong
shoulders in their moments of grief. Life was
at its starkest and matter-of-fact.
I recall visiting a long-standing friend,
Shiva (name changed), about five months
ago and catching up with his family and
his charming mother, an ever-smiling and
a positive person, one of the few that I have
known with such endearing qualities. She
was a cancer survivor. Her husband is a
chronic diabetic who has had some of his
toes amputated but was a fitting match to his
wife in resilience and take-it-in-your chin
attitude. My friend has inherited the best
of his parents’ attributes and nothing fazes
him. Some coffee and conversations later,
I took their leave with the promise that I
will visit them again soon to partake of the
excellent food that she prepares. Within the
next week or so, she gets afflicted with Covid
and had to be hospitalised. I recall talking
to her on the phone and wishing her well,
she was her usual cheery self and looking
forward to coming home. Simultaneously,
her husband too had to be hospitalised
as his sugar had spiked. Their other son,
my friend’s brother, was in Bengaluru
and he and his wife too were afflicted with
Covid. Within the next three days, I get the
shattering news that my friend’s mother
has passed away and so has his brother in
Bengaluru for lack of oxygen availability. A
close-knit family, whom I knew well, losing
two of its members a few days apart. The
commiseration with my friend was difficult,
to say the least, and no words could comfort
enough. I will never get to see her smiling
countenance or have her exquisite food
again, save for happy memories of the past.
SENIORS TODAY | ISSUE #31 | JANUARY 2022
but significant ways. What stayed with
me was the extraordinary equanimity and
cheerfulness of my friend in spite of all the
travails and tragedies of life. He is blessed
indeed; there is so much to learn from him.
On a related note, the other day I came
across a Japanese aphorism which says that
all of us have three faces. The first face you
show to the world. The second face, you
show to your close friends and family. The
third face, you never show anyone, it is the
truest reflection of what you are. However,
from my personal philosophical perspective,
I have a different view on it. We can be at
equipoise in life and happy only when all
the dimensions of our personality, overt
and covert, are aligned. If I were to allude
to our meditative practices in the path to
self-realisation, chitta manaha ekagrata is
a principle of oneness between our body,
mind and intellect .
I should confess that it is all work-in-
progress for me and I am hoping that one
day I will get to that state of ekagrata. In the
meantime, I am realising that my mind is
variously a beautiful servant, a dangerous
master!
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