Page 48 - Seniors Toady - September Issue 2020

take your custom. And if you still foolishly
insist on being told the price of something
in his shop, he’ll put you in your place by
saying: “It’s expensive.” While the other
crass and shameless pursuers of business
open up yards of cloth and waterfalls of saris
for you to choose from, the Maharashtrian
shopkeeper will indicate a tightly packed
stack and ask you to make your choice
quickly. No “Aaiye behenji, kya piyengi?”
obsequiousness from him. If it was legal
and didn’t cost money, he’d hire someone
to stand there with a big stick so that you
don’t annoy him by entering in the first
place. Many shops carry a stern warning
on a little blackboard right at the threshold:
“No pointless (“phaltu”) enquiries”. This
includes asking for directions or for change
for a hundred rupees, asking what time it is,
An example of a Puneri Patya, typical curmudgeonly asking for water to drink or for the price of
notices that Pune homes are famed for
anything in the shop.
just had tea.” And that is that. Don’t take it
personally. We are like that only. If you had Steeped in culture
visions of chai and pakodas, you’re in the But here’s the thing: We’ve had women
wrong part of India. The Rest-of-India may doctors and writers and thinkers for over
waste time and money on hospitality. We two centuries now. We’re big on education
have better things to do. and reform. We’ll change trains, take buses

‘Look only if buying’
The Maharashtrian shopkeeper extends
this rather dim view of visitors to his
customers too. Just because circumstances
have placed him in a position to have to soil
his hands with the degrading task of selling
things, that doesn’t mean you take undue
advantage of him, enter his shop, and rub it
in, by actually asking for merchandise and
service, dammit. They’ve got their strategy
worked out. While one may greet you with
a “We don’t stock it,” another may helpfully
point you towards some more enterprising
shopkeeper (who is dismissively referred
to as ‘non-Maharashtrian’) where you can ‘Are you absolutely sure you want to buy something?’

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