Check List, not a Bucket List

Make your check list today, for it may be too late tomorrow, advises Nagesh Alai

Unified payment interface and universal banking are well entrenched in our eco-system, thanks to the technology developments and the active push of the government in the interest of gender-neutral financial inclusivity of our denizens including those in the rural areas, faster reach of welfare benefits, plugging leaks, inculcating pride of individual identity, ease of transactions, access to funds, financial independence, etc. The UPI and QR scanner have become a part of our everyday being and living with everyone from the shoe-shine boys to street vendors to the household helps to grocers to hospitals to high end retailers using it as a preferred and faster mode of receiving payment for their services and sales and conversely a preferred mode of payment for the consumers across the demographic diversity. 

In this background, I find it odd that our household help requests me to transfer her monthly pay to an account held by her husband. When I query her, she says matter-of-factly that her bank account is at her gaon and that she has not bothered to open an account in her name after marriage and move to Mumbai. When I advised her that regardless of where she has her account, in today’s world she would be able to access it from anywhere and that it would make sense for her monthly pay to be deposited into her account. It was the same story with our cook as it was with a fruit vendor from whom I buy regularly. These women slog through the day, but she is not in direct control of their hard-earned money. In many of these cases, the husbands are either of poor health or jobless or drunks or just given to living off their wives’ labour. 

I recently read a newspaper report of a young recently married women in a rural area committing suicide after discovering that her husband had AIDS and had not revealed it to her. The conjugal rights had led to her contracting the disease. 

Then there was the case of an elderly couple who had given a power attorney to their son, in good faith, so that he can take care of their investments and ensure their financial security. A hope much belied that saw them suffering and embarking on a legal fight to regain control of their finances after years.

I know of a case of two youngsters who had met on a dating site and had gotten comfortable with each other to get to the marriage stage. Both came from distinguished educational backgrounds and self-sufficient. Nevertheless, the bride’s family was conservative and insisted on a horoscope match. Unfortunately, the horoscope did not match on most parameters.  The worried parents of the bride, particularly the father, insisted on the groom sharing all his confidential financial data, etc., which was met with significant resistance for obvious reasons. A family meeting was organised, where the bride’s parents, aunts and uncles all descended at the groom’s house to meet his parents and talk it out. The groom’s father was a practical man of convictions and asked his son and the would-be bride if they were seriously interested in each other and had faith in each other. They replied in the affirmative. He further convinced the bride’s father that from their side they are accepting and welcoming of the bride and they should similarly trust the groom. In the world of internet access, he could well look up the net and do enough background checks. The reasoned approach convinced the bride’s parents about the financial foundation of the groom and ultimately led to the solemnisation of the nuptials. The groom’s father also suggested to the young couple, as a prudent measure, to check out their blood compatibility in advance in the interest of their wellbeing and welcoming their offspring, should they wish to have one. 

There are surfeit cases of divorces, custody battles, cheating builders, booking amounts not being refunded, projects remaining incomplete for years, misuse/misappropriation of fixed deposits, un-dematerialised shares and unclaimed dividends getting transferred to the government, health insurance exclusions leading to denial of medical claims, etc., each of which create overwhelming challenges and hurdles. 

We all have our own bucket list of things ‘to do’, most of which are aspirational/inspirational, but not really necessary for life and living per se. It would rather be more relevant to have a check list, covering key elements/facets, to live life better. Some of the illustrative key elements that need to be covered in the check list are (not in any particular order):

1. All existence documents to be preserved and kept retrievable – birth registration, marriage certificate, existence certificate (for continuing to receive pension), ration card, Aadhaar card, voter card, PAN card, driver’s license and passport.
2. Owner’s name to be registered and updated on property/property tax portal.
3. Owner’s name to be updated in electricity/piped gas/cylinders providers records.
4. Original registered property documents to be kept in safe custody and making a note of the property registration number for easy access to information.
5. Keep a record of all your bank accounts and investments (including portfolios managed by advisors) so that your spouse/family can know/access that information after your grand exit.
6. Recording your nominees’ details in all your assets – banks, shares, MFs, properties, etc.
7. Follow a primary rule of ‘your earnings go into your bank account’.
8. Think a hundred times before standing as a guarantor for anyone, be it a relative or a friend. Be very choosy. I know of people who have been ruined because of them guarantying someone’s borrowings. 
9. A duly executed will – with one copy to be kept with your lawyer/executor.
10. A living will, specifying your choice of treatment if you get incapacitated.
11. In the case of a dependent child, earmarking funds for the child’s upkeep and details of caretakers/institutions under whose care the child will be looked after.
12. While the jury is out about this aspect, it would be advisable to keep your family informed that you have executed a will and a living will.
13. Ensure that you continue to remain in charge of your life and resources and not delegate to it anyone, especially as long as you’re mentally and physically able and sound.
14.  Maintain a healthy and tempered lifestyle. Be active. Without your health, you will be dependent and no one likes dependence. 
15.  Periodic health check-up is a must, it will give you addressable early warning signals.
16. Details of all your insurance policies, pension corpus, health insurance, etc should be shared with your spouse and immediate relatives.
17. A detailed health/DNA check of every couple, prior to getting married, to be assured about the future/continuing good health of the couple and family. This is crucial, albeit there may be a resistance/reservation.
18.  A list of all your assets and liabilities and the details of where they have been stored. These should be updated periodically.
19.  Cataloguing all your art, gold and jewellery with all relevant details of source and values.
20. A documentation of your health issues and the treatment route.
21. An affidavit, executed duly, should you wish to donate your organs after you pass.
22. In today’s world of individualism and independence of thought and action, divorce and re-marriages, live-in relationships, etc., it may be practical for any couple to enter into a prenuptial agreement evidencing a detailed approach to individual income and expenditure, single/joint holdings, contribution to joint expenditure, shared responsibilities, assets and liabilities and distribution thereof, alimony on separation/divorce, custody and care of children, custody and care of child from previous marriage, etc.

Though prenuptial agreements are not within the current framework of law and would be subject to various religious/personal/marriage laws, it does help the courts directionally while settling marriage/divorce disputes. In several cases, the various courts have used the prenuptial agreement/intent as the basis of settlement. 

Many may be dismissive about all or some of the above, particularly the prenuptial agreement and the living will. However, it may be practical to recognise the current realities and the generational shift in approaches to life in general and living in particular. Afterall, inherent faith in the past has given way to inherent doubt in the current. It will be mature to accept this reality. Philosophically, everything will be alright for everybody, till one fine morning something gets triggered and sets in motion a series of changes and incidents which will alter our life completely. None can control that, but a check list can contour our life till then. Make your check list today, for it may be too late tomorrow. A bucket list can wait, but not a check list.