Reading Time: 4 minutes
In India the relationship of a couple is quite different to that of a couple in the West, say, the US or the UK. A couple in India is tied up with in-laws, kids and a large number of relatives who somehow hold on to each other. In the West, the children grow up and are forced to leave home, and once they leave, the relationship with the kids kind-of dims and the couple live for each other. In India, it is quite different. The kids grow up, parents get them married, they have grandkids and parents are involved in looking after their grandchildren’s and the cycle of life begins again. In all of this, the couple’s feelings for each other often fade.
Team Seniors Today researched into long-term relationship of married couples, some of the issues mentioned below become problems in marriages that never get resolved and couples stoically live through the agony of a failed relationship.
Unravelling the reasons behind fading affection can often feel like embarking on a complex emotional archaeological expedition. The reasons are multifaceted, ranging from personal growth to relationship dynamics, and understanding these can provide clarity and perspective. We evolve as individuals. Our requirements, desires, and life situations may shift over time. This growth can result in a definite drift from each other. Lingering unresolved disputes or constant disagreements (family issues can be the root cause of marital problems) can erode the sense of love and connection, leading to apathetic distancing.
Stress from work, family, or other sources can seep into the relationship, often masking or overshadowing the love you feel for each other. When external factors play a role in the relationship and it falls into a routine with little novelty or excitement, it’s easy for the initial passion to wane, leaving one feeling unfulfilled. The decrease in shared intimate moments can lead to a slow decline in romantic sentiments for each other.
However, in the layers of emotions that a relationship represents, it’s essential to remember that losing feelings does not always equate to losing love. In the beautifully complex world of human emotions, the feeling of ‘falling out of love’ can often leave us puzzled and disheartened. Feeling your love fade in the relationship can be alarming, yet it’s not an uncommon encounter. In long-term relationships, it’s quite natural to occasionally experience phases where your feelings seem diminished or less vibrant. This doesn’t always signal the end of love; rather, it’s often a reflection of routine, stress, or personal struggles creeping into the relationship’s emotional landscape.
This isn’t about the occasional disagreement or fleeting annoyance. It’s a more profound, persisting feeling of detachment or indifference towards each other. The spark that once burned brightly appears to be smouldering, the passion diluted. It’s an emotional state marked by a lack of desire, enthusiasm, or interest that was once integral to the romantic bond you shared.
What are the signs of losing feelings? Certain patterns and behaviours, however, can act as telltale signs indicating a potential decrease in romantic sensibilities. Understanding our emotions can be tricky and painful. You might find yourself getting more irritated or frustrated with your partner over seemingly trivial matters. A notable decrease in emotional and physical engagement, including a lack of empathy or connection during conversations, could be an indicative sign. Understanding and acknowledging these signs could be a first step in addressing a situation.
To help each other, a couple needs to have an honest and open conversation. In a non-confrontational and loving manner, clarity is effective in problem-solving and can help in reducing misunderstanding and work towards healing and growth within the relationship.
Talk to a relationship counsellor, a professional can provide a safe space to start a conversation and explore complex problems, offer guidance to suite the situation.
A couple can relive the past or create a new activities that both can enjoy watching a movie, cooking or involving themselves with nature, going on hike or even creating a balcony garden. These new experiences enable you to view each other in a positive light.
Intimacy plays a vital role in keeping the flame of love burning in a relationship. Whether it’s through deep, soul-baring conversations, tender touches, or simply sharing a good laugh over a shared memory, try to find avenues to reconnect with your partner on an intimate level. Physical closeness can fuel attachment, affection, and love. A strong intimate bond can serve as a catalyst to reignite dormant feelings, stimulate connection, and restore the affection that seems to have waned. Restoring lost feelings is not a sprint; it’s akin to a marathon. Understand that feelings, especially those tangled within a relationship, need time to untangle, heal, and find their ground. Allow yourself and your partner ample space and time to process these emotions, heal any unseen wounds, and rediscover each other in a renewed light. Patience fosters an environment of understanding, empathy, and acceptance, allowing for the complex journey of love to unfold in its rhythm.
Dedicate time to engage in activities that enrich you as an individual, be it a new hobby, reading, meditation, fitness, or self-help courses. These experiences can bring about newfound self-understanding, confidence, and perspective, which can indirectly breathe life into your relationship. By better understanding yourself, you can better understand your needs within the relationship.
In the chaos of daily life and amidst dwindling romance, we often overlook the good in our partners. Practising gratitude can help shift this perspective. Regularly acknowledging and expressing appreciation for your partner’s qualities, actions, or simply their presence in your life can help foster positive feelings. It’s a simple yet effective strategy to remind you why you fell in love in the first place, potentially sparking those lost feelings. As you laugh, learn and grow together through these experiences you reawaken the feelings that have dimmed and get the zing back into the relationship.
